Thursday, July 24, 2014

Dealing with Frustration and disappointments during weightloss

Often talking to my peeps, I have noticed how sad one can get when we don’t see results after working hard to be fit. We keep going and pushing ourself, struggling through diet n workout and yet no outcome!!! Sure, it is disheartening. We start to think "I want to give up” Or "Its not worth it". We feel we have worked too hard, too long to get minimal outcome. We want to see the change in a month or may be over night. Involuntarily comparisons start and we get into a vicious cycle of negativity that losing weight is not possible, or I cannot stay away from my favorite food any more (Junk food). What should one do then? When temptations start to creep and determination starts to go down hill? Wish we had a magic wand.

My observation through out my struggle is when you don’t see results, most of the time you are doing something wrong. Knowing that, now next thing is finding out what is wrong, and fixing it. Remember that this is your journey, and none else’s. So if you cheat, you cheat yourself, if you are sincere you see the result. Hard work is never wasted.

Some points to ponder over:

Know that stopping the process of following a healthy life style out of frustration is not going to get you where you want to go. If you don’t see any outcome, you need to keep going without having a deadline, trying better each day. Planing how can i make it better today than yesterday, evryday. Each morning is a new beginning. So don’t beat yourself up if you ate wrong yesterday. Start fresh today, and if possible make up for yesterday by either eating little lower calorie diet than normal n working out slightly more. After all this is a life style change, not a temporary solution. If you get frustrated with it, how will you continue this for entire life? At least you know continuing is not going to do any harm, but stopping will make it worse. Dont go crazy n starve. Just modify diet to have fewer calories. For eaxmple I could workout and burn 300 calories and eat 200 cal less to negate my 500 cal intake yesterday. Or I may just burn 100 cal more at gym this entire week.

Know that you did not gain weight overnight, so you are not going to lose it overnight. Any attempt to do so will be followed by frustration and disappointment. So be ready for it if you try to do anything that claims to lose weight with minimal effort and quick. There is no “quick”, there is no “easy”. There is only slow and steady.

Know that there is no short cut to good health. You have to earn it. You have to work hard for it. It may take as long as multiple yrs or more or as short as few weeks depending on your goal, effort and consistency. I stress my 3P here. Patience, Persistence and Positivity. Even bigger challenge is maintaining your loss, so if you don’t accept it as lifestyle change be ready to see the gain again.

Know that no 2 individuals are the same. Their bodies are different, their life style is different, their desire to achieve better health is different and their needs to feel better are different. Someone can be extremely happy with a loss of 10 pounds while someone may think I have just lost 10 pounds, I have so much more to go. Either way, recognize your need and do your best to fulfill it. Do not compare yourself to anyone else on this planet. You are an individual and you need to believe that you will get what you want if you work for it. No one can unfortunately work for you in this scenario. So be prepared to work hard.

Know that if you think you are giving 100% and seeing no change from a long time, you are doing something wrong somewhere. Logging food and exercise helps a lot initially. So you can go back and look at your diary and see what you have eaten and what could have been avoided. Try better this week, and see if it helps. Change something, either diet wise or workout wise. See if it makes difference. Experiment. It helped me to log in my diary and I used MyFitnessPal. There are plenty out there, find out the one you like. Remember Lisa says Calories in should be less than calories out, and you will see it. (Love you Lisa Lyon for making it that simple. That’s the magic mantra). Simplest way to start is by eliminating certain foods from your diet completely. Say bye bye to sugar, white flour, high fat foods etc. Eat fruit/Veg with each meal. Learn to read labels and choose best things for your body. As far as possible avoid packaged processed food.

Find out what’s wrong- probably you are eating too late at night, or may be over eating healthy foods or unknowingly snacking and not making a note of it. Did a glass of wine turn into 2 or 3? How about the Sodas & smoothies & lattes & mochas? They are not calorie free remember that. Ohh! And what about eating one bite from each person’s ice cream bowl. I know you dint have one, but you still had a bit from each kids bowl. Don’t lie to yourself. You are doing it for you, not someone else. So do it with full heart else don’t bother coz you will be disappointed.

Know that each person you know has something he doesn’t like about himself, so you are not alone. Focus on what you like about yourself. Enhance what you can, fix what you don’t like. Just because you feel you don’t have something, don’t feel worthless. If something you don’t like cannot be fixed, accept it and keep telling yourself what is positive in you. It helps built confidence.


Accept yourself the way you are, work on yourself, give yourself credit for achievements and accept the new you. Don’t criticize yourself all the time, and see how far your journey has taken you. Be proud of your hard work and often pat your back for doing good job. Remind yourself to keep doing better every single day. Each drop counts. Set small goals, target it, achieve it.

To see results, consistency is the key. You cannot work hard whole week, and eat crap on each weekend, or you cannot reward yourself in terms of food because you worked out that day. You can reward yourself for doing a good job in other ways like getting a new workout outfit, or new pair of sneakers or may be something materialistic that you really wanted. A single lavish dinner can ruin a whole week worth of hard work. So be aware of this before you indulge. You dont have to dine out each weekend, Or try eating good and go for a dance in a club n burn it out. Take responsibility of what you eat to avoid disappointment. Before eating, think if eating that food is going to disappoint you tomorrow. If the answer is no, go ahead eat it. If answer is yes, then why are you doing it? Eating out does not have to be high calorie. In each restaurant I have been to, food is very much customizable and you can totally avoid what is bad. Go for grilled meat instead of fried, Cut out the chips & Salsa in starters and skip the desert.

This journey is not easy, not impossible either. Just takes a little effort and sincerity. You live once, and you deserve to feel your best in your life. And once you get there, it’s so amazing that you would never want to go back to where you came from. So have a goal, not in terms of weight loss particularly, but more on the lines of being active as much as possible and eating as better most of the times. Weight loss will happen when you don’t wait for it to happen, but do whats needed with full dedication. Eat clean, move, make motivated friends with similar interests, motivate others around you. Enjoy the process of the transformation, research on what others are doing, experiment & find what works for you.

Where there is a will there is a way. If there is not, you can make one. I have made amazing friends on myfitness pal. I have made life long relations in my gym. This journey has gifted me confidence, friends, hobbies, better health and tons of positivity which affect all angles of my life. I am glad I embarked on it long long ago, still going and hoping to recieve much more going forward.

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